Funny Whatsapp status: Friends today, I will share Funny status for Whatsapp and funny Quotes with you. I hope you like this Status.
There are many people who like to read Funny status.Also there are many friends who have searched on the internet, funny status for their Gf Bf. Today I have brought for him . Friends, I hope you like this Funny Whatsapp status and you will benefit.
Read more: Friend Status for Whatsapp
Funny Status for Whatsapp
- I’m not lazy, I’m on energy saving mode.
I love my job only when I’m on vacation…..
- Life is Short – Chat Fast!
If life gives you lemons, just add vodka.
- How can i miss something i never had?
Girls use photoshop to look beautiful.. Boys use photoshop to show their creativity.
- Fact: Phone on silent mode- 10 Missed call… Turns volume to loud- Nobody calls all day!!
Girls, if he only wants your breasts, legs, and thighs. send him to KFC.
- You can never buy Love….But still you have to pay for it ..
If you are going to speak bad things about me on my back, come to me. I’ll tell you more.
- Did anyone else notice the sound if you click the like button on my status?
I live in a world of fantasy, so keep your reality away from me!
- A bank is a place that will lend you money, if you can prove that you don’t need it.
My biggest concern in life is actually how my online friends can be informed of my death..!!
- When I’m a Pedestrian I Hate cars.. When I’m Driving I Hate Pedestrians…
Whoever says “Good Morning” on Monday’s deserves to get slapped.
Read more: Best Family Status
Short Funny Whatsapp Status
- Mosquitos are like family. Annoying but they carry your blood.
Who needs television when there is so much drama on Facebook.
- Everything funnier when your supposed to be quiet..
I want someone to look at me the way I look at cupcakes!!
- Save water drink beer.
6 Peg Loading .. 😀
- Dear Lord, there is a bug in your software…it’s called #Monday, please fix it
Always wear cute pajamas to bed you’ll never know who you will meet in your dreams.
- God is really creative , i mean ..just look at me 😛
Decided to burn lots of calories today so I set a fat kid on fire.
- When I’m on my death bed, I want my final words to be “I left one million dollars in the…
I wake up when I can’t hold my pee in any longer.
Best Funny Status on Whatsapp
- My father always told me, ‘Find a job you love and you’ll never have to work a day in your life.
Life is too short smile while you still have teeth…
- My study period = 15 minutes. My break time = 3 hours.
If College has taught us anything, it’s texting without looking.
- I’m Jealous Of My Parents… I’ll Never Have A Kid As Cool As Theirs!
I Like to study.. Arithmetic – NO … world history – NO …. chemistry – NO …. GIRLS – YES!!!
- Friends are forever, until they get in a relationship!!
People call me mike .. You can call me tonight..
- Faces YOU Make ON The Toilet lol (o_o) (>
Funny Whatsapp status for Friends
Checking your symptoms on Google and accepting that fact that you’re going to die.
- Sorry about those texts I sent you last night, my phone was drunk.
We are WTF generation …. WhatsApp, Twitter and Facebook
- Having a best friend with the same mental disorder is a blessing. LOL
It’s been 70+ years, Tom. You’re never going to eat Jerry.
- I want some one to give me a Loan and then leave me Alone.
There’s like 7 billion people in this world and no one wants to date me. I hate this world … huh
- Dear Lord, all I ask for a chance to prove that winning the lottery won’t make a bad person.
I don’t usually sleep enough, but when I do, it’s still not enough.
- The only thing I gained so far in THIS YEAR is weight.
The most powerful words other than I LOVE YOU is “Salary is Credited” .
- Running away does not help you with your problems, unless you are fat.
I wonder what happens when doctor’s wife eats an apple a day.
- GOOGLE must be a woman because it knows everything.
I only need 3 things in life: Food, Wi fi, Sleep.
- TODAY has been cancelled. Go back to BED.
I’ve had a horribly busy day converting oxygen into carbon dioxide.
- Some people should have multiple Facebook accounts to go along with their multiple personalities.
At least mosquito’s are attracted to me.
- Laughing at your own texts before you send them because you are so damn funny.
I really need 5 hours of Facebook to balance out my 5 minutes of studying.
- Today morning when I was driving my Ferrari, the alarm woke me up. 😀
My family says I talk in my sleep but nobody at work has ever mentioned it. lol
- If you love someone, set them free. If they come back, nobody else wanted them either 🙂
Today’s Relationships: You can touch each other but not each others phones.
Whatsapp Funny Status
- I am sure I have a defective iPhone, I keep pressing the home button and I’m still at work.
My bed is always extra comfortable when I need to get out of it in the morning.
- I always learn from mistake of others who take my advice 🙂
If time does not wait for you, don’t worry. Just remove the battery from the clock and enjoy life.
- If school has taught us anything, it’s texting without looking.
I hate people who steal my ideas, before I think of them.
- All my life I thought air is free until I bought a bag of chips.
Try to say the letter M without your lips touching.
- Nothing moves faster than a girl untagging herself from an ugly picture.
I look at people sometimes and think ….. Really?? That’s the sperm that won.
- How do people write an auto biography? I can barley remember what I had for lunch yesterday.
Funny Status on Friends
- Nothing is illegal until you get caught.
Admit it, you listen to other strangers conversations and mentally give your opinion.
- Dear Google, thank you for doing most of my homework for me.
Girls work on their looks but not their minds b’coz they know boys are stupid, not blind.
- I hate when people all of a sudden decide to be funny when I am drinking something :
Only fools fall in love and I guess I’m one of them.
- God made everything that has life, rest everything is made in China.
Friday is my second favorite F word.
- For all the girls that say ….. All guys are the same …… Who told you to try them ALL.
I think I got a fever, a fever of you.
- I always give 100% at work: 13% Monday, 22% Tuesday, 26% Wednesday, 35% Thursday, 4% Friday.
Please GOD if you can’t make me slim, make my friends fat.
- Its better to fail than to cheat but its better to cheat than to repeat.
Most emotional moment in a boys life, When a girl says, Can you give me your number.
- Thanks to Google, Wikipedia, and whoever the hell invented copy and paste. Thank you Guys.
Funny Status Line
I don’t believe that love comes to those who wait. Today love comes to those who flirt. LOLz
- Dear Food, Either stop being so delicious or stop making me fat.
It’s funny how people judge other’s mistakes while they also do the same thing.
- The question I have not been able to answer is “What… does a woman want?”
Boys will be boys as long as there are no girls in the picture.
- Dear MATH, stop asking to find your X, she’s not coming back.
I speak two languages, Body and English.
- BRB = I don’t want to talk to you. LOL = I have nothing else to say. Cool = I don’t care.
I’d like to thank the internet, Google, Wikipedia, Microsoft Word, and Copy & Paste.
- Kiss me and you will see how important I am.
If you can’t find the key to success, pick the lock.
- Everything I like is either Illegal, Immoral, Fattening, Addictive, Expensive, or Impossible.
One should always be in love. That is the reason one should never marry.
- Love is 1 drink and 2 straws. Marriage is “Don’t you think you’ve had enough!”.
Quit your job, buy a ticket, get a train, fall in love and never return.
- If you wish to avoid seeing a fool, you must break your mirror.
Caution, Blind Man Driving.
Funny Whatsapp status in English
- Milk does the body good but DAMN how much did you drink?
If life gives you questions, Google gives you answers.
- The only thing that interferes with my learning is my education.
Scratch here ▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒ to reveal my status!
- Whatever it is — I didn’t do it!
I’m not short, I am just concentrated awesome!
- You can stay in my heart without paying single penny.
If you don’t care stop talking about it.
- Girl, you better have a license, coz you are driving me crazy!
Flip a coin… If head comes, I am yours, if tail comes then you are mine.
- She loves me or not but I love her a lot. 😛
I took an IQ test and the results were negative.
- Laugh alone and the world thinks you’re an idiot.
I can handle pain until it hurts.
- I used to think I was indecisive, but now I’m not too sure.
Gravity always gets me down.
- If life doesn’t scare the shit out of you, you’re doing it wrong.
I gotta go to work today because millions of people on welfare depend on me.
Read more: Facebook Status in English
Funny Whatsapp Status About Life
- When I eventually met Mr. Right I had no idea that his first name was Always!
What do girls want? EVERYTHING!!!
- Money can’t buy LOVE but can buy WOMAN to make LOVE
I know the door to your heart belongs to another, but I think I can slip in through the window.
- Behind every successful man… There is a confused woman.
You can fool some of the people all the time, and those are the ones you want to concentrate on.
- Laziness Is The Mother Of All Bad Habits But Ultimately She Is A Mother And We Should Respect Her.
Sorry… I’m not Rihanna. I don’t love the way you lie.
- Never make the same mistake twice, there are so many new ones, try a different one each day.
I swear my pillow could be a hairstylist I always wake up with the weirdest hairdos.
- HEY YOU, yeah I’m talking to you, why the hell are you reading my status?
You can never really say what’s on your mind, when your family is on Facebook.
- I really want to work so hard. But being lazy is so much fun.
I used to have an open mind but my brains kept falling out!!!
- If Sunny Leone marries Sunny Deol, she will also become Sunny Deol.
Dear LOL and Hamm, Thanks for being there when I have nothing else to say.
Whatsapp Status for Funny
- Dear Sleep! I Know We Had Problems When I Was Younger! But NOW I Lubbb you.
Our generation doesn’t ring the doorbell…we text or call to say we’re outside…
- We live in WTF generation – Wikipedia, twitter, facebook
I was born to be a pessimist. My blood type is B Negative.
- When people don’t laugh at my jokes I just assume that they’re not up to my level of comedy.
I follow the quote, “Always be true to yourself” because I only lie to others.
- If “Da Vinci Code” has been written by Punjabi author then its name would be “Vinci Da Code”!
Dear mom and dad, when I lie to you, it’s for your own good.
- Excuse me! Ye lijiye aapki soch. Mujhe giri hui mili thi.
Every time I drink I get awesome.
- After getting drunk, Bachelor of Technology turns into Master of Philosophy.
Bitch is just a term used for girl who refuses dog’s proposal.
- What i if told you…you the read first line wrong… same with the second…
I am so cool, my selfie is called a kulfi!
- Some people have relationships and some people have patiyala.
Be careful of following the masses – remove the “m” and who exactly are you following?
- I came here in peace, seeking gold and slaves.
Onions make me sad. A lot of people don’t realize that.
- It’s not that I’m afraid to die, I just don’t want to be there when it happens. – Woody Allen
I’m on a whiskey diet.. I’ve lost three days already.
- I don’t worry about terrorism. I was married for two years.
Everything is 10x funnier when you are not supposed to laugh.
- People who exercise live longer, but what’s the point when those extra years are spent at gym.